By Faye Armstrong.
The best cure for Monday Blues oddly isn’t drugs and sex. Odd.
The Monday blues are as common as builders and butt cracks, children and head lice, OAPs and opinions.
To cure builders flashing the flesh, a pair of high-waisted jeans with a secure fitting belt should be prescribed. To cure children of infestations of the head, I suggest taking a razor to the area above their cherub faces. To cure OAPs of overzealous and under-researched opinions, perhaps a coffin, buried deep within the earth, may be the best solution.
With such great advise, I trust that you’ll believe me when I tell you that the best way to rid yourself of the Monday Blues is to get your toosh to Guanabara, on the corner of Drury Lane (you know, where the Muffin Man lives. The Muffin Man? Yea, the Muffin Man. He lives on Drury Lane) where you will be able to eat, drink and dance your troubles away until the count of 12 when it officially turns Tuesday.
At Guanabara there is not much to be blue about. Especially on a Monday as happy hour (2-4-1 Brahma, 2-4-1 on all cocktails, 2-4-1 double vodka red bull and all house wine £9) runs allllll night. BOOM. And it’s free entry. BOOM. Entertainment comes in the form of Guanabara’s exclusive silent cinema (BOOM) and free Samba classes between 7.30 and 8pm with Rosa Nazira, who knows how to shake her hips. BOOM.
You can eat if you wish. My guest and I sampled chicken strips, deep fried with a spicy Brazilian dip and salt cod fish cakes with chilli oil and lime to start. For mains we decided the best thing to do would be the share the Copacabana platter; a plate laden with Brazilian street foods including Kibe, Risole, Coxinha and more. Although, it’s not the food you go to Guanabara for, it’s the fun.
As my friend and I took to the central stage to twist, shake, grind, shimmy and shoulder-pop, I had this overwhelming feeling of happiness. I don’t know why, it could have something to do with the endorphins ‘they’ – the scientists – say are released when exercising. But this didn’t feel like the torturous exercise I have become accustomed to at the local gym (OK, I lie, I don’t go to the gym, but I can imagine the pain the red-faced, wet-bodied crowds at the gym I walk past en route to the pub are going through).
I snuck off under the pretence of a ladies ‘pit stop’ but instead took up refuge at the back of the room to watch the group follow in rhythmic time with the dance instructor. All, except my friend Jen. Bless her, she was trying, she really was, I could tell. But her limbs moved out of time and her body was ungraceful next to the dance goddess’ aside her. It is for exactly this reason that I love her so, and for exactly this reason that my night at Guanabara led me to smiling to the point of cheek ache.
If you too want to work on your cheek muscles, and your Samba skills, why don’t you pop down one Monday soon. The upcoming listings for the secret Cinema are as follow:
May 16th – Bus 174. Hard hitting documentary about the world news headline event when a bus was hijacked by a youth in Brazil.
May 23rd – Life In The Rhythm & Favela Rising. Highly commended Rio Film School production about the effect of music on the inhabitants of Rio de Janeiro and a Q+A with the producer.